Today is my birthday and I am not happy. Despite of getting 130 birthday wishes by now, all of them wishing me for a happy day, I am not. I was so excited for my birthday and I don’t even know why.
I thought it will be the day when the ones I love will remember me after a year. They will probably call or drop a text to me. Well, a lot of people did but there are a few whom I gave a part of my heart, haven’t. Maybe they will remember me later, maybe they will never wish me, I don’t know.
I also realized that I am turning old and I haven’t managed to find one person who will be there with me as my partner. I haven’t found anyone who can make me a human again, who can bring me back from this self destructive dead existence.
I have lived alone giving love and a family to those whom I love but that is just not enough I guess. It’s never enough. The only end result of my love is to watch them go with someone else.
Probably, I need to end this life and begin a new one completely fresh with new challenges and new life. I think I need to decide something soon.