How bad your wound is? How deep is that scar on your soul? How much have you been broken down? Do you remember the time when you were all alone and no one to comfort you? Wasn’t that your loneliness who accompanied you when no one else did?
I started falling in love with my loneliness. It became like a habit to feel loneliness around me, even when there was a crowd around. I succumbed to it’s comfort, the comfort that ensured, no matter what happens to me, no one will even care, no one will be affected.
Oh that assurance, knowing you’ll not leave anyone in pain behind. That was so comforting that I gradually fell in love with that loneliness. I fell so hard that I stopped caring for who stays or who leaves me, creating a void around me, inside me, bigger and bigger with each passing day.
Like in every relationship, or should I say, in every toxic relationship, there comes a day when you can’t take it anymore and you decide to move on. I did that too. I surrounded myself with people whom I called… Sorry, not just called but considered them real friends. One by one, all the characters played their parts in my life and they kept moving on, leaving me behind. I guess I deserved it for I had abandoned one of my truest love, my loneliness.
Hi loneliness! We meet again. I knew that one day, I’ll come back to you. I’m sorry for even thinking that there could be someone who would comfort me like you did. I have learnt, all of them give false and temporary hopes and they are all futile. When a person loses all hopes, you are the one to stand by their side.
Everyone I came across while I was away from you, they all have gone far away. They all left for some or the other reason. And I’m here once again, alone, with you. I do not wish to lose you again. Stay with me and take me back. I’m ready for you. I know, no one else but you would accompany me in my last breath.